A Dispatchers Life Is The Life For Me!!!

I need a break!!!! I love my job, don't misinterpret anything I'm going to say, I really do love my job. However... If I just had to deal with my coworkers, my job would be swell (with just occassional dealings of lunacy). Unfortunately I have to deal with the public and a fairly good amount of the public I deal with are I-G-N-O-R-A-N-T!!!! You may say, "Winter that's not nice" or "Winter you shouldn't be so judgemental" to which I would have to respond "Get over it!" If you did not agree with me on some scale, then one of two things is apparent 1) You do not deal with the general public and therefore cannot possibly begin to comprehend how aggravating and discouraging STUPID people can be or 2) You have a drug or alcohol problem (wether prescription or not) that keeps you super mellow or oblivious one. OUCH! Yes... shame, shame you know my name. Now before you get all super spiritual on me, let me give you an example of a call that I could get on any given day, this one just happens to be an acutual call I took yesterday. (Everything in red will be me and ( ) represents what I'm thinking.) Lincoln Parish Sheriff's office... Yeah I'm here at Lincoln Hospital and they called me and said my brother has been shot 3 times and they said he ain't here and the call came in on the i.d. lincoln hospital and I drove from monroe and now they're saying he ain't here. Sir, sir, who is they? Someone called from that lincoln hospital number and gave my brother's name, date of birth, and social security number and said he's been shot so I drove up here and now they're saying they haven't seen him. Who did you speak with on the phone from the hospital? I don't know they just called and said my little brothers been shot and I drove all the way over here and noone has seen him and I want him found. Well sir, the sheriff's department has not received any calls about anyone being shot tonight, have you tried calling the Ruston Police dept.? Why? I would think that the sheriff's dept is better. (keep in mind at this point he is extremely agitated) Sir, it has nothing to do with being better. The police dept covers everything in Ruston, they handle thier own calls. The could have had a call concerning someone being shot, you would have to speak with them about it. You mean ya'll don't know a damn thing that's going on in the city! Sir, they would only notify us if they needed assistance or they had a chase that took them out of the city into the parish. Well, I'm from monroe and Ouachita parish Sheriff's is over the police dept!! (no they're not, moron) Sir, I'm well aware of who has jurisdiction where and no that is not how it is run. All I'm trying to tell you is that the call may have gone through Ruston and they may have information I don't have. This is bulls*** I want you to find my damn brother. Sir you're going to have to talk to us and give us a description of your brother, where he was last seen...Fine I'll f******* walk down there and give you something, where the hell are you? We're on 167 across from the First Baptist Church. (silence) Hello? Hello (new guy) Who am I speaking with? (names will not be mentioned to protect the ignant) As I was trying to tell your friend, we're going to have to have a desription of his brother, where he was last seen, and other information before we can go find his brother. That was my brother you were talking to and ma'am we're just trying to find my little brother. Someone called us from this number that came up lincoln hospital on the ID (you say it because maybe I'll have some sort of revelation from your tone when you say the same thing your brother has said ten times now!!) and we drove all the way from monroe to check on him and they're telling us he's not here and now someone just told us the fire dept hasn't made anykind of calls with a gunshot victim. Sir, have ya'll tried calling hospitals in monroe? No we got the call and rushed over here. We just need you to find our brother. Sir, is it possible this was a friend of your brothers making a prank call. This isn't funny!!! (no s*** sherlock) I'm not saying it is, it is definetly not funny. I'm just saying that if the call came from Lincoln Hospital, it could have been from the payphone because I know if your brother was there at the hospital, the staff wouldn't lie to you about him being there. Where was your brother last at? I don't know. Where does he live? I don't know. He lives from place to place, I think he might have been staying with his mom's ex-husband in calhoun. Oh, is that his dad? No! That's his mom's ex-husband. Now, while I'm having this mind numbing conversation one of the deputy's that was in the radio room visiting with me (I don't always have this luxury) called Ruston PD, Quachita S.O., Jackson Parish SO, and Union Parish SO none of which has worked anything along the lines of someone getting shot. So I relayed this information to my caller and tried to reinterate that unfortunately this was probably some horrible prank call, which I could understand getting angry about but not taking it out on the dispatcher who had nothing to do with the call in the first place!!! So we pick up after I've reiterated it was probably a prank call. Well, I guess my brother and I will just have to go kicking ass until we find out who called us and did this!! Sir, I wouldn't recommend that because for one thing you don't know who did this and two that will get you and your brother arrested. Yeah well this is bulls*** and someone is going to have to explain. Sir I understand your angry and you want to kick someone's ass, but you need to calm down and start calling people who might know where your brother is and see if anyone has seen him. Yeah, well thank you and I hope I never have to talk to you again! Ok, goodbye. Bye! CALGON TAKE ME AWAY!!!!!

Let Your Voice Be Heard

If you believe in Justice... PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE go here http://www.petitiononline.com/dwayne/petition.html and sign the petition. This on the official Dog the Bounty Hunter Website.

FREE THE DOG!!!!!!

Yeah, yeah, yeah...I know I'm stinkin it up with my blogging. Please forgive me. I was even reprimanded on myspace by a blogger turned covert myspace stalker, I won't name names. Now, I would like to take this opportunity to give a shout out to Jessica Bufkin, what up Homeslice!!!
Now I want to get onto the matter at hand. For those of you who are not familiar with Dog the Bounty Hunter and his posse, check this out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CfWWl3fraws
If you haven't been paying attention to the news or haven't found this to be of any kind of importance, here's the dealio. Apparently, 3 years ago Dog, his brother Tim, and son Leland went to Mexico based on a tip that one Andrew Luster was there. Andrew Luster, for those who don't know, happens to the most gangreous cancer on the butt of humanity. Senor Luster apparently drugged, raped, and videotaped approximately 86 women in the US, then fled to Mexico to live out his life in freedom and fun. Dog, who has been a bounty hunter for about 25 years, made it his personal mission to bring Luster to JUSTICE. He went to Mexico, like I said earlier, and it just so happens the tip paid off and they found Luster. They made a decision and apprehended Luster, however, according to the Mexican "law" bounty hunting is illegal. Mexican officials saw the commotion and arrested the whole lot of 'em. Eventually the Federalis, did come to understand who Luster was and he was sent back to the US for JUSTICE. However, Dog and His Posse spent a few days in a Mexican jail. They were held for, I forget exactly how the mexican police termed it, basically kidnapping. According to Dog, once he was released on bail, his attorney brought them back to the states and told them it was a minor charge. Now fast forward three years later to September 14, 2006, US Marshall's storm Dog's, Leland's, and Tim's homes on a "Mexican" warrant. They arrested him in the name of Justice. Yes, what Dog did was "illegal", but my goodness...what do you call what Luster did. Dog and his crew took a dispicable man off the streets and brought JUSTICE for those women Luster brutalized. Now OUR GOVERNMENT, the good Ol U.S. of A., is actually taking orders from the Mexican government, and actually considering extraditing a truly good man on completely bogus charges!!!! What is wrong with the law?!?!!!!!! Sometimes I think the old west ways weren't so bad, you know. This man was as guilty as sin and should have been thrown under the jail, however he was released on a million dollar bond (chump change for the heir of the Max Factor millions) and was able to hop the border and party for months without any recourse...until the DOG!!!! I don't care what you think about the show, Dog, Beth, or anyone else on that show... that man is a HERO and He did a very HONORABLE thing. Paula Cole asked a very good question a few years back...where is my John Wayne?....Where have all the cowboys gone? Well there is one good man left and he is under house arrest, awaiting the US's decision to extradite? My friend Big Nate has a quote on his myspace that states...Evil men prosper, when good men fail to do anything. Thank God for good men, who do right even when everyone else tells you to back down. FREE THE DOG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Apparently, God Is Just A Big Meanie!!!

I've been doing alot of thinking the past few weeks. I know people, been told about some people, and read about people who say they are Christian and live however they want to live. I know I have written a few times about this matter, but maybe I've been wrong. Why shouldn't we be able to do whatever we want, if we are Christians? I mean, come on, as Christians we are "covered by the blood" of Jesus. Automatic forgiveness, what could be better. What kind of God would not let us do whatever we wanted to do, as long as it makes us happy? If we are a Christian, then God is our Father, right? A good father wants his children to be happy and therefore must let his children do whatever makes them happy. I have a few great examples of parents who let their children do whatever they wanted to do, and the awesome results which back this theory up.

Example #1---My best friend from sixth grade, Jen*(name has been changed to protect the innocent). When I met Jen, in sixth grade, I thought she was so stinkin' cool. Why was she so cool, because she smoked. The more I spent time with her, I realized her mom let her smoke (what an awesome mom!). Jen also drank and ran around with older guys, like highschool aged guys. (This is just getting better and better isn't it!) I loved spending the night with her, not only because she was my best friend, but I got to do all those really cool things too (of course without my mom knowing, my mom was too mean to let me do whatever I wanted to do). I discovered from my friend Jen, that she really began smoking at the age of 8. Her Mom caught her smoking and never made her quit, HOW AWESOME!!! Now for the phenomenal results: Jen dropped out of highschool our freshman year, was the mother of 3 by around 20, and developed a drug problem. Isn't that the most awesome thing you have ever heard?!?!

Example #2--- I met this young girl "C" when she was around 12. She grew up down south (around New Orleans) and her mother let her roam the streets at like 9 years of age (that's so awesome!). By the time I met her, she been with more men (sexually) then she could count and had a sexually transmitted disease (at least one that we knew for sure). Isn't that great, I mean how many parents would be so amazingly cool as to let there kids run around New Orleans unsupervised. Phenomenal results: "C" of course will have the gift that keeps on giving in the STD, she has been in several different lock down facilities since I met her, and more than likely she will be in and out of jail once she's too old for juvenile facilities. How wonderful is that?

Example #3---Ok, I don't know these people personally but I know everyone has seen these kids on the Maury show or Montel or some show like it. How bout those totally amazing parents who would not deny their kids whatever they wanted to eat. Not only did these Awesome parents let them eat whatever they wanted to eat, but they let them eat whenever they wanted to eat. Phenomenal results: These kids are 8 and weigh anywhere from 150 to 250 pounds. They probably won't live to be 20 and can't run around a pole, much less the front yard. Hooray juvenile obesity!!!!

You may have noticed (at least I hope you noticed) I was being just a little bit sarcastic. Now, these are true life examples that I listed, with true life consequences. Unfortunatley some people grow up with parents that would rather be a friend than be the one to say: "no", "you can't have that", "you can't go there", "you're not old enough", "that's bad for you", and the ever popular "because I said so!" Just as our earthly parents set rules and guidelines for our safety and well being, so does our Heavenly Father. Why do we think that we know better than God and that we can just over look those passages in the Bible where God says NO? No, sex outside of marriage...No, getting drunk(this can include drug abuse)...No, idols (anything that is worshiped over God)...No, gluttony...No, sexual sin. Why does God give us all these stinkin rules? Is it because he doesn't want us to be happy? No, God wants what is best for all of His children. How many people do you know (this can include one's self) have given themselves to someone that they knew they never should have gotten involved with, and ended up being heartbroken and miserable because it didn't work out. Not to mention pregnancies, abortions, std's, and all the other things that can go wrong with any sexual relationship. Sexual sins aren't the only devastating sins out there, there is also: alcoholism, drug addiction, gluttony, stealing, lying, etc. All of these feel good starting out and maybe even feel good for a while, but the minute it stops feeling good who gets blamed. Who do we run to, complain to, and even (dare I say it) get mad at? God, that's who. Why? We get mad when He doesn't give us the ok to do whatever we want. We also get mad when we do whatever we want and it all goes wrong. Can I just say ISSUES!!! Stop looking at God as some heavenly bully and start seeing Him for the loving Father that He is. The kind of Father that doesn't let you do whatever you want, because He loves you. "I have plans for you", declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." ----Jeremiah 29:11

Just a quick note

I wanted my blog fam. to know that I have been given the opportunity to share my testimony on the 1st. If anyone is in the area I would love for you to come; it will be at Calvary Baptist Church in Ruston at 6:30pm (in the back). If you can't come (and even if you can) I would greatly appreciate your prayers. Thanks so much, love you all!!!!
By His Grace---Winter

SEX,SEX,SEX.....Enough Already!!!!

Now that I've got your attention. I have debated for a while about posting this, and I have decided I have nothing to be ashamed about. In this day and age we are bombarded with sex. Sex to sell anything from cars to shampoo. Sexual inuendo is in practically everything: tv commercials, tv shows, movies, magazines, enema instructions for cryin out loud...ok, maybe not the enema thing, but you catch my drift. The thing that aggravates me and depresses me, is the fact that most people assume, because I'm 27, I have done the horizontal mambo (I know, that's tacky). Why, is a question I DON'T ask myself anymore. I've had people ask me, "do you have any kids?" I reply, "No...I'm not married". Then they look at me funny, as if I have something hanging out of my nose. Then I kindly explain to them, I'm a virgin and I'm waiting until marriage. Oh, the looks I get then. Most are looks of shock and awe, some of disbelief, and some look at me as though I'm lying. Of course I get questions and the silliest one has to be: "Don't you ever think about?" No...I am so pure and holy that I am able to block it completely out of my mind whenever I turn on the tv, go to walmart, or watch a movie. Give me a break. As much as I would love to be able to say I have been completely pure (in mind and action), I cannot say that. I'm gonna go ahead and be honest, it's not easy maintaining purity...especially in these days and times. Doing the Godly thing is NOT, I repeat, NOT easy. If it were, everyone would be a christian. No, it's not easy, and noone could ever accuse me of saying that it was. That's why I am so thankful that God promises in His Word: "I will NEVER leave you or forsake you" and "Come to me all you who are weary and heavy laden, and I WILL give you rest." Can I be even more honest with you? Do I want to get married, Boy do I!!!! However, I would rather be single and stay a virgin the rest of my life, if the alternative was to sacrifice my morals, beliefs, and body to be with someone who I wasn't supposed to be with. I tried the sacrificing of morals thing, never want to do it again. To any guy and any girl reading this (that is single) there are worse things in this world than being single!!! What, you may ask, could be worse? How about giving you heart to someone who doesn't love you, doesn't respect you, and could care less about being with you. I've seen that over and over in so many people, all for the sake of not being alone. Wanting to feel loved, even if there is only one person giving love. I understand that loneliness, man do I understand it, but it is NOT worth the pain it causes to be with Joe or Jane blow down the block for one moment of pleasure. Wait, I say, wait upon the Lord. Don't give Him a time limit, He doesn't work on your time table. He knows what He is doing, and He knows better than anyone who you or I should be with. I promise you, He will never, EVER let you down. Better yet, He promises, He will NEVER let you down.

Confessions Part 2....

I have to confess something (yet again). I have been terrible for the past couple of months with the whole eating right, exercise, no carbonated surgary beverages thing. Alas, even three weeks ago I fell off the wagon and had me a gool 'ol Dr. Pepper. I had hoped that because I had gone nearly 3 & 1/2 months without a "real" coke or d.p. (only coke zeros), that I would hate the taste. Oh but NO, that was not the case. The moment I took that first drink was almost like one of those herbal essence commercials. It was the most glorious thing I had dared to drink, EVER!!! The eating right and exercise flew out the window, pretty much the day I swithced positions and started dispatching. I went from a steady monday-friday 8a-5pm job, to 12 hour shifts 6to6, one month days...one month nights, two on...three off...two on...two off...three on...two off...repeat. Basically 11 hours stuck in this small radio room, with a coke and snack machine right around the corner. I have gained 4 pounds from my original posting back in march (see: Hi, My Name is Winter and I'm an). Now this is weight gained after losing about 7 pounds before I started dispatching. Therefore, (for those of you whose math may be rusty) I have gained a grand total of 11 pounds since about mid April. I'm turning into a lazy blob and I hate it, yet I cannot find the self motivation to change it. I realize just HOW MUCH of a problem I have, and really how much I need some help (more like lots of help). Is there anyone here in Ruston that would be willing to do first place or something like that with me? First Place was a really good program for me in high school, but I am willing to try anything. Thanks for any help anybody can offer, even if only in prayer.

Memaw's Biscuits

I used to be a less cynical person, when it came to people that is. I have discovered that if you want to become truly cynical and less hopeful of the good in man, work with the public. I have worked at some truly "character building" jobs since, well..... since I started working. However, the most challinging jobs I have had (by far) were 1)the Methodist Children's Home and 2) dispatching at both Bienville and Lincoln Parish Sheriff's offices. I have seen and heard things that at some point made me question the goodness of God. Now wait a minute,....before some of you decide to jump on me, hear me out. I'm sure everyone has had moments like this. The rape, abuse, and mistreatment of children tend to make one sit back and ask, "God why do you allow this to happen?" If you have NEVER done that, than you must have super hero Christian "powers", and I stand amazed at your ability to not have those moments. I, however, admit my inability to remain so strong in my faith. Yet another thing that adds to my extreme cynicism is the overflow of RIDICULOUS calls I receive (and received) everyday I work (worked) at the sheriff's office. (Past tense is in regards to Bienville parish). I'm not talking the legit calls i.e. : traffic accidents and the sort. I'm talking: "my neighbors headlights shine into my window at night and it wakes me up"or, "I want this man out my house, he hittin' me and stuff" (two days later same caller) "I want this man out my house"---didn't we remove him the other day, "yea, but we was doin' alright and he said he was sorry, but I'm sick of him today." To quote a great philosopher: "AAARRRRGGGHHH!!! GOOD GRIEF!!! (mad props to you if you can name that philosopher) I swear, some days I feel like this world has gone mad and there is nothing good left. I keep thinking: "Jesus I know your just around the corner and I am SOOOOO ready!" I, however, saw the sweetest thing that took me back to simpler times. I was in SuperOne in Ruston on Sunday; I was rushing to grab a snack to take to my church group when I heard something that made me stop in my tracks. In the cookie isle was a white haired grandma looking lady, in front of her was a buggy with (what appeared to be) two little grandsons (maybe 6 and 8) sitting in the buggy. That scene was touching, but what capped it off was when I heard "grandma" say, "Now get what you want." Instantly, I was taken back to the times My sister and I would spend the night with Memaw and Pa. She would pick us up, we would go to Brookshire's, and she would tell us that same thing, going down the cereal isle. "Memaw can we get this cereal?" "Get what you want", was the reply. We would then go to the house, watch tv and have cereal and a ham sandwich. In the mornings, usually the first thing to wake us up, was not Memaw, but the smell of sausage cooking and (you guessed it) Memaw's biscuits. In that moment, at SuperOne, I was taken back to a sweet time. A time when things were good, and everything was made right with Memaw's biscuits. I realized, in that instant, that maybe everything wasn't so bad. At least for two little boys, who probably enjoyed cereal, ham sandwiches, and their very own version of "memaw's" biscuits.

Being saved is NOT a free ticket to sin! So why should I be a Christian?

When I was in high school and started going to church, I had a great youth minister by the name of Mike Teague. Now Bro. Mike (as we all called him) used to say: salvation is not a free ticket to sin. I used to agree, because, for one thing, he was right, but I never truly understood what all that entailed. I thought, duuuuhhhhhh, of course you can't go out and get drunk, kill people, steal, be a nympho...I could go on and on. What I was looking at were the so called "big" sins or "obvious" sins. However, I'm seeing something that is becoming a huge problem. I'm as guilty (probably more so) as anyone else, when it comes to this. The problem is this, Christians who are going around letting cuss words fly, drinking and going to clubs (just to dance or for what ever reason) and being perfectly ok with it, because they are covered by these four words: "God knows my heart". You're right God does know your heart, but does the nonbeliever sitting next to you know your heart, does the agnostic dancing next to you at the club know you're a believer. What do these people see that is so different in your life that would make them stop what they are doing (and having a very fun time doing, mind you), lay it all down, pick up their cross, and follow Christ. If you honestly think the answer to that question is anything but NOTHING, then you are sadly, sadly mistaken. We are living in such a time where Christians are put under a microscope and criticized for EVERYTHING we do. I would rather be criticized for doing the Christlike thing than to make up my own rules and have nothing to back it up with. The Bible says we are in this world BUT not of it, and while we are in this world we are to "shine like stars in a crooked and depraved generation". That doesn't mean that we go around with picket signs and tell everyone what they are doing wrong. What we are supposed to do is spelled out for us in the Word, follow the example of Christ, plain and simple. Be a light, forgive as we have been forgiven, set an example in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in purity. As a Christian, we can't just go around making up our own rules! Look to Jesus before you go or do ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING. Honestly...I mean H-O-N-E-S-T-L-Y... ask yourself would Jesus be on this dance floor doing what I'm doing? Would Jesus be telling and or laughing at this joke? Would Jesus be happy that I am about to jump into bed with this person? Would Jesus......you can fill this in with your own question. Jesus is THE EXAMPLE, not Billy Graham, Beth Moore, Ron Luce, Louie Giglio, or anyone else that you can think of. Jesus Christ is the plumb line and only by Him can you measure anything. I think we have gotten away from that truth. We want to read good "christian" books to tell us how to live, how to raise our children, or to interact with other people (believer or nonbeliever). In the process, we have replaced the simplicity of discovering the truth in God's Word and spending time with Him to reveal to us what we should or should not do. If I've offended anyone by what I've written, well I don't apologize... I think maybe you should dig into why your offended. I've only spoken the truth and what God drove home with me just a few days ago. I'm not writing as if to someone else, this was a truth that had me weeping (seriously) in the middle of my kitchen at 10:00 at night. I know too many people that are heading down a path of destruction, but have labled themselves Christian. I'm talking about self proclaimed swingers, liars, homosexuals, adulterers, nympho's, racists...and I realized, I can't say anything to anyone of these that I've mentioned, when I am not standing apart and even make exceptions for certain sins. Why would anyone want to be a true christian, when they can just do what they want, when they want because God knows their heart and he will forgive them. I know I'm rambling at this point, but this truly is a problem that needs some radical movement. We need to be so broken and on our faces before the Lord for what is going on in the "church" today. And broken over the confused and misled that are on a path leading straight for hell. Oh Lord God, break our hearts for the sin in our land, heal the broken and confused. Lord we need you so desperately. I pray that we as Christians, can start truly being a light and a true representation for Christ. Forgive my rambling, but this is such a burden on my heart right now.

Confessions Part 1...

These are my confessions. Just when I thought I said all I could say....WAIT!!! I think that's a song or something. : P Ok, I really do gots to confess something. I'm having a very, VERY difficult time quitting the Coke zero and sweet tea (the latter is a different story all together). There I said it, please do not cast your stones at me. I'm realizing just how addicted I am to carbonated beverages. This roundhouse kicked me in the face due to my actions the other night. Picture it Ruston, 2:30 am, I had no carbonation in the house, so I grabbed my keys got in my g-ride, and drove the 5 or so miles to a convenience store and purchased 3 twenty oz. coke zeros. As soon as I got home and downed one of those preciouses, everything was right in my world. I realized, I have a problem. I see why it wasn't so difficult to quit the real stuff; I had a substitute of sorts. It's almost like I'm going to have to lock myself in a padded room for 48 hours and experience the shakes, hallucinations, and whatever else may come with it. UGH!!! THIS IS HARD!!! I right now have a huge goal that I'm wanting (and needing) to work towards and I am being thwarted by...well...ME!! I have decided that my feelings can be best expressed by the ever mentally unstable (nothing but love M.) Ms. Mariah Carey in her collaboratory hit "Heartbreaker" with the youthfully retired Jay-Z. "Ooh your love's so good, I don't wanna let go. Even though I should I can't leave you alone, cause you're so disarming, I'm caught up in the midst of you and I, can not resist. ...Heartbreaker you've got the best of me, but I just keep on coming back obsessively. Oh why did you have to run your game on me, I should of known right from the start You'd go and break my heart." (I do believe that sums it up pretty well, thank you Ms. Carey and Mr. Z for your help.) Thanks to those of you who have given me words of encouragement and I would ask for your continued support. If anybody has any tricks or anything that has worked in the past for you, please pass that along. However, I need you to keep in mind: I'm dispatching now and I am working 12 hour shifts, I may not be able to be relieved when I may need to go (if you know what I mean). My bathroom breaks are super sporadic, so that makes me very nervous about drinking alot of water (which I know is what I need). So....there you go. Thank you, again, for the support.

If loving you is wrong...I don't wanna be right, but I should strongly consider it!

As some of you may, or may not know, I have been off the sauce (real cokes and dr.peppers) for 39 days, 10 hours, and 32 minutes (who's counting). It truly has not been that bad, in fact it's been a fairly easy transition for me. This transition would not have been so easy without the help of Coke zero. I have been drinking those things up like none of your business. However, I was reading in the latest issue of Fitness magazine the other day, when I came across this article: "21 WAYS TO MAKE YOUR DIET WORK 100% EASIER". Well, I thought to myself, "I'm all about easier, anyday." So I turn the page (since the title took all of pg. 93) and lo and behold what does #1 say to do: "SAY SO LONG TO SODA". Now, I'm starting to pat myself on the back and be really proud of myself, until......I read the rest of the article. This is the statement as written on page 94: "Every diet soft drink consumed each day could increase your risk of being overweight by 65 percent, according to a study presented at the American Dietetic Association. Other research suggests that artificial sweeteners may actually stimulate appetite, causing you to overeat. Instead, sip plain or sparkling water with lemon added for flavor." (all italics and bold added by moi) It was upon reading this that I had to face some hard truths. That in order to achieve my goal of weight loss and fitness (that I'm wanting) I have to say goodbye to a dear, dear friend. Oh Coke zero and Diet Dr. Pepper with your fizzy carbonated, artificially sweetened goodness, I love you but I must let...you...go. Oh this is tearing out my heart, but I must be strong. My feelings can only be expressed through the words of a beautiful song, sung by the ever canadian Celine Dion : "Every night in my dreams, I see you, I feel you, that is how I know you go on. Far across the distance and spaces between us, You have come to show you go on. Near, far, wherever you are I believe that the heart does go on, Once more you open the door, And you're here in my heart and my heart will go on and on. Love can touch us one time and last for a lifetime, and never let go till we're gone. Love was when I loved you, One true time I hold to. In my life we'll always go on." Oh Coke, Dr. Pepper and all sugary (and now artificially) sweetened carbonated beverages, I love you but I've got to let you go. Just know that wherever you are, my heart will go on and I will always love you. "And I ee I will always love you ooh ooh".... Ok, I'll stop now.

I'll Never be a Part of a Dancing Ministry!!!

Disclaimer: Let it be known that I am no way sitting in judgement or saying anything about any person in making this post. This is just my personal conviction and basically, this is how I roll.

I have to confess something to everyone....I went to a club this weekend. No, I'm not talking about The Girl Scouts or Math club. I went to a club, club. You know, "we gon tear da club up", type of club. I readily admit that at the age of 27, I have never before gone to a club, nor have I ever, EVER, wanted to. I know there are those people who can't wait to turn 21 so that they can legally go to a club or bar. I was not one of those. However, I did want to purchase alcohol when I turned 21 and I didn't even get carded the first time I tried (I was totally bummed!) I digress. I went with some friends who wanted to dance, and I told them I would go but I don't dance (so don't ask). I was completely fine with going and watching them dance (although I don't think they believed me), and I did watch lots of moronic people whose spiritual gifts did not include dancing. It was sitting there in this club, in the "hip-hop" room of this club, that I realized what I have been missing all these years by not going to the club. I know your all dying to know what that is, well......I'll tell you. What I've missed, by not going to clubs in my entire legal life is, nothing. Not a single, solitary thing. Sure, maybe I've missed some disturbing images that can only be removed via a total frontal labotomy...enough second hand smoke to give a herd of cattle lung cancer....being hit on by creepy guys in there fifties. Those things may appeal to some people, but not me. I know some people just like to go dance, to let loose and shake their respective "groove thangs", but that is not me. I know my limitations, what I can do, what I can not do, and what I should NEVER do...dancing happens to fall under the latter. I say all of this to say: If we're hanging out and everyone wants to go to the club...I'll stay and watch the car, and be more than happy to do so.

WARNING: This is not a happy post!

Ok I've been reprimanded by Megchael (go with it, it's working for all hollywood power couples ie: Brangelina) and Mrs. Kathy (who can resist the prompting of Mrs. Kathy, really?) about the laziness of the posting. I wish I had some great, fun, and exciting something to post but...I don't. In fact, if I had posted how I'd truly been feeling over the past couple of weeks ya'll would have to take an antidepressant to read it. I've just been very down in the dumps lately. I am not particularly enjoying living alone at the moment and it's killing me not having friends (here, near me I mean). The one close friend I do have in Ruston hasn't spoken to me in a couple of months (my fault) and the relationships I have at the lambright, are with younger college kids who have their own lives and things they like doing. Although going to the q-stick or to keggers is loads of fun to them it's not to me. I've been told that I need to put myself "out there" more, what does that mean. For some that I've spoken to, that means clubs and bars. Now, I've never ever been one for going to either of those places for a couple of reasons, 1. Getting drunk in a public forum or being around drunk people has never been a huge highlight of my life. 2. I don't have mad dancing skills and so shaking my groove thang in a public forum is a huge no, no. Now, on the christian front what does that mean, to put myself out there more? Well I've discovered for the big metropolis of Ruston it means.................well...................................................................................hmmmm.......
....................I know there's something.........................................Oh, there's the frothy monkey and crescent city......................................................
.then there's.......................................................................... ummmmmmmmm.......................................................................................wait a minute........................ ...................................railroad park, I guess I could watch a train with somebody............of course there's ............
............................................ well........................................................ Ok, you catch my drift. I just hate feeling so stikin' alone. I hate coming home to an empty house, it makes me almost miss living in the trailer off of hwy 80 (and for those of you who knew what that was like, you understand the desperation I must be feeling to miss that!) Maybe at some point while I was growing up, I prayed that I could be by myself (growing up in a 960 sq. ft. home with 5 other people and sharing a bedroom until my senior year of high school, who wouldn't?) or maybe I'm being punished for the hwy 80 trailer escapades (which I deserve). Who knows? All I know is I'm sad and alone and I don't like it. Any words or thoughts?

True Life lessons from... Spongebob Squarepants!?!

Ok, so I admit it. I'm really just a big kid. I never stopped watching cartoons; in fact, I love watching cartoons. You don't have to think too much or get into some deep plot line, just turn em on and laugh or zone out (it is purely the viewers choice). However, as silly as they may be, you can learn some great life lessons and even (dare I say it) apply some biblical teaching as well. Hey, if some people could find the story of Jesus in the Matrix then I can find it in Spongebob Squarepants, don't judge me! Now, on with the lesson!!! In one particular episode of S.S. , Spongebob and Patrick learn about borrowing. However, they are taught this lesson by Mr. Krabs, and Mr. Krabs doesn't necessarily do all things, how you say, by the book. In fact when the question of asking someone's permission to borrow an item was mentioned, Mr. Krabs' reply was, "ahh permission schmermission, everyone knows that it's ok as long as it's returned before it's missed." After said lesson from the Krab, sponge and pat then "borrow" a balloon from a street vendor, the balloon pops, they panic, leave town (because we're not talking about bank fraud or some stupid mail scheme, they stole a balloon), turn on each other, and eventually turn themselves in to the cops (because of the guilt), and discover that they stole a balloon on national free balloon day. Oh, this particular episode is full of biblical truth, no really. If you ever watch S.S., you will see that Spongebob is just a very naive, loving, and trusting individual, who basically sees the good in everyone. Patrick is even more naive and very simple... some may even say stupid, but very trusting and innocent (much like a child). Now if you take sponge and pat's nature and mix that with a lie that as a little bit of truth mixed in and you've got trouble. I think most people take the Mr. Krabs approach, he knows he is stealing and yet when confronted with it, he straight out lies and mixes some truth to it so that it doesn't sound bad. I have found that alot of people do that very thing, when caught in the very midst of doing wrong, it's never an absolute wrong. Example: a young man (we'll call him Bob) has joined the army, he's 18 and lives in Louisiana, his buddies throw him a going away party, an of age person has provided the alcohol and gives it to the 18 year old. For those who don't know, LA law states you cannot purchase or consume alcohol until you are 21. With that being said, is Bob breaking the law. If you waivered at all or your answer was no, then you are like Mr. Krabs. For as much as you may not agree with someone who can be shipped off to war and die for our country but can't drink a beer, the law is still the law, and what he did was break the law. Now here's an example of moral right or wrong, that a whole lot of people don't have a problem with. Let's say there is a couple (we'll call them Jack and Diane), who have been dating a year, and are "oh so in love". Now, Jack and Diane, say they love God and read the Bible and believe it and they love Jesus. They decide they want to take it to the next stage, so they move in together. What?!? The Bible is very clear on this issue, ah, but they're in LOVE, and they're gonna get married. Are they wrong? Too many people (I'm including church folk) waiver on this issue, because one of their loved ones is doing this right now. So instead of saying this is wrong... now it's, well...they're gonna get married it's ok. Now, if you put Mr. Krab like people in places of authority or (heaven help us) in church leadership that's when you've really got trouble. How many people are like spongebob and patrick (you know, child like) when it comes to matters of faith? They weren't raised knowing or reading the Bible, or going to a Bible teaching church, but they want to know about it. So they go searching and find a church that teaches, "hey you can live together, no problem, you're homosexual and want to live together, no problem, you have a wife and a girlfriend, no problem. you're a compulsive liar, no problem, you love to "love" little children, NO PROBLEM". "You know why? Cause God is love and God loves you and wants you to be happy". (In essence do what makes you happy) You see the lies mixed with some truth. Yes, God loves us, but he hates sin and a sin, is a sin, is a sin. No one sin is better or worse than the other, they all equally hurt the heart of God. So, one big lesson here is don't be like Mr. Krabs (he's not very honest), and don't be as gullable as Spongebob or Patrick (even though they are very sweet). Measure everything agains the plumb line of God's word and Jesus Christ. Thank You! (and you didn't think I was gonna do it)

Just cause I can...now what?

Blame this on the fact that I miss everyone sooooo much or that I just realize how blessed I am and have been in my life. This is a total shout out page for everyone and anyone who has made an impact on my life. So here I go!

• Mom, Dad, Rickey, Curtis and Denise, and Autumn- We've laughed, we've cried, we've bit (thanks alot Autumn!) We aren't a perfect family, maybe even a little dysfunctional (maybe alot)...I wouldn't have it any other way. I love you guys so much, you mean so much to me.
• Aarin and Amanda- I miss you two sooooo much and I love ya'll more than you could ever know. You two are my sisters, I would go to the ends of the world for you. (Cause that's what Bunneez do!)
• Kalei Morgan- What more can an Aunt say about the greatest niece in the world. You make me smile and my heart happy. You are the best bookah in the world!!!
• Tammymama and Emerson Crew- I know I don't come around like I use to, but I know if I show up today you'd welcome me in the kitchen and say, "fix it yourself terd!" Ya'll have always been so supportive, loving, and real. Thanks for not giving up on me or forgetting me, like you could! : D
• Aunt Waneta and Uncle Jerry, Dean and Jackie, Kylie, Nate, Debbie and Brian, Buster, Boon, and Julia!!! (a.k.a. The Rahmig crew) What can I say but I love you, I love you, I love you. My heart hurts knowing I don't get to see you but once a year and knowing I might not see ya'll this year...ok I'm actually starting to tear up. Just know that, although we are separated by many, many miles you're never far from my heart.
• Aunt Cindy and Uncle Monty, Uncle Gaithel and Aunt Joyce, Erin and Tabitha and kids, Corey and Dawn and kids, and Travis (a.k.a. the rest of my yankee family) - I get to see you guys even less (no good), but you still mean so much to me. I love you all! Maybe ya'll should try Louisiana for a while (I'm sure you're seriously considering it!)
• Memaw, Aunt Wanda and Uncle Gary, Denise and Jamie, Heather, Zachary, April and Bubba, Chloee, Austin, David and Aleida, Chandler, Thomas and Brandi, Bekkah, and Aiden. (a.k.a. the Smith crew) - What can I say? We've grown up together, laughed together, grieved together, eaten together, phase 10'd together and some of us have bathed together (I do believe somebody has a picture or two of that!) Ya'll have helped make me who I am today. I love ya'll.
• Kathy Nelson- What can I say about the most AWESOME woman of God I know!!! I can only imagine the number of crowns that you have in heaven waiting on you. I love seeing the love of God all over you, the passion you have for the Lord and His Word is what draws so many to you. You and Mr. Rick and the girls will always have a special place in my heart.
• Kathy Rowland, Ann Patterson, and Lisa Trussell- Words cannot express what you wonderful women have done in my life. You saved my life and loved me when I couldn't. You walked beside me and refused to let me quit. Lisa, bless your heart, I know you could write a book! : D Kathy you are my rock! Ann, your stubborn love and sensibility, is what I love about you. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!!!!
• Jessica B., Beth Ann G., Meg Mitchell, Stacey "Scriber"Scheer, and Amy Shaffner (sorry if spelling's wrong) - Don't be surprised ladies. You were the old school BSU ladies, that I admired. Maybe I didn't tell you then, but I learned so much from ya'll. I even learned (during a mission arlington trip) about submission and lifting up our brothers in Christ. I learned you can be ghetto and a southern belle at the same time (I don't know how you do it Jessica). Never ever doubt the impact that you may have in someone's life by just being who you are. Thanks for being "real" women in my life!
• Michael Sanks - We go back, way back. Thanks for giving me my first rambo, that's a true friend. I am so proud of you, to see what you have gone through, to where you are now. I am so glad that God saved my most favorite friend and blessed him with a beautiful wife and wonderful life. I love you Michael, you're like a brother to me (just one I don't get to visit often).

Ok, when I started I didn't realize how long this was going to be (which is making me so so thankful). Sorry but I'm going to have to cut this short. So be looking for part two.

Would Jesus ever tell me to back that "thang" up?

Disclaimer: By no means, in writing this post, am I saying that I am in any way a moral authority or perfect by any means!! I also readily admit that I am not perfect and know that I make poor choices pretty much daily. Furthermore, I am not attacking this particular organization as a whole, nor can I blame just one person either. Finally, it is with a burdened heart that I write this post, take it or leave it.


Ok, so you all know that I do massages at the Lambright at Tech, and I workout there as well (which you may not have known). Last night I took off from massaging, but I did go to workout at around 7:45. I got done around 9:15, and having been in the cardio room the whole time, I was unaware that an organization at Tech blocked out one of the gyms for a night of skating, which was in full swing by the time I finished working out. I was hanging out at the front desk, swiping cards and chatting with my friend Meg and it was at that time I discovered which organization was sponsoring this shindig. The music was loud, but I really wasn't paying attention to it, for the most part. It wasn't until somebody said, "that's Roll Out". Which is a rap song with not so good language and content. It wasn't until I heard "Back That A** Up", that I finally went in the gym, because the music was so loud and bouncing off the walls I really couldn't tell if the song was edited or not. I went in there to find out if this organization had gotten a dj or if this was totally run by this "ministry". I discovered much to my saddened heart that it was indeed entirely run by them. I was talking with one of the guys there and he truly had a problem with the music being played, but as I looked around it would appear that he was the only one. Yet another guy that I was talking to, and I love this kid, said, "people won't come if all we play is chrisitian music." I thought how sad is that, this would have been a wonderful opportunity to show the world that there is all kinds of different christian music out there and that you can have fun without being lewd, vulgar, or crude. Unfortunately, this ministry went with the flow, in fact, they were no different than any other organization that has rented out the gym for skating events. How sad...how sad! Jessica, Meg and Michael, John and Amy, and all you old schoolers I think you all would have been appalled. I think of the damage that was done, because EVERYONE that came in that night was told, "if you want to skate, the BCM is sponsoring it in the red gym". Now I know nobody was killed or maimed or anything along those lines, it's not physical damage I'm referencing. I thought what if somebody needed to see Jesus last night. What if somebody needed to be encouraged? What if somebody has been wondering, "what's so different about these christians?" Alas, after last night they would have found their answer, which was nothing...nothing at all.
Give me some feed back here, if I'm wrong let me know.

I Have Abs.....Who Knew?

Ok, it's been 8 days, 16 hours, and 10 minutes since my last real Dr. Pepper. Yes I AM counting, for now anyway. : ) So I started working out on tuesday (3-28), thanks to a great, wonderful, sweet, kind, and caring friend by the name of Kate (was that enough props?) I have an organized plan of attack and workout buddy! However, in doing this thing called "working out", I discovered some muscles that I thought had disappeared. You know just vanished over time, due to lack of use. Why, it puts me in the mind of the scripture that states, "the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away". Well, I just figured the Lord tooketh away my abs and gaveth me extra cushioning in its place. However, that was not the case. No, they have been hiding, hibernating if you will and when I awakened them, they weren't too happy. They rebelled against me, threatened me, dared me to try another crunch. However they were agreeable to trying a Crunch bar (as sold by Nestle)! Guys, my stomach hurt for three days and I'm not joking!
In all seriousness, the devil has definetly been trying to convince me many times this past week to give up. "It's too hard, what's the point, you'll never reach your goals, blah blah blah". I just had to keep holding on to the promise that, "GREATER IS HE THAT IS IN ME, THAN he THAT IS IN THE WORLD". (note that the reference to the devil got no caps, bold, or italics because that's how small he is!!) That's not to say that my eating has been great, but everyday is a new day. Also, that's not to say whenever I see someone walking by with a real dr. pepper in their hands, I don't think about knocking 'em down and taking the pop (that's a total shout out to my Yankee family, CORNHUSKERS ROCK!!! :D) I know that with God on my side and great, great, great and totally awesome friends with me, I can't fail! Plus, if I give up Iris will beat me up. For those of you who don't know Iris, she's the baddest mamma jamma I know. Thanks Homie!!!!

Hi, My name is Winter and I'm an...

Ok, I decided well before I started blogging that what I'm about to do is something that I possibly should, could, and need to do. Not that I couldn't get by and do just fine without doing this, but the more accountability I have out there, the better. Also, I am partially motivated by my favorite reality show, The Biggest Loser (as seen on NBC). The idea being, if I just put myself out there, there may be ridicule but the support and encouragement would far outweigh the bad (no pun intended). So without further ado, I shall complete the title: Hi, my name is Winter and I am an addict. Ok, before anyone goes balistic and my mom has a heart attack, it's not drugs. I am addicted to food, preferably junk, and Dr. Pepper (coke, dr. thunder, mr. pibb, mountain dew, and any other form of sugary carbonated beverage). I have struggled with my weight since I was 11 or 12 and there was one time in my life (since that age) that I was healthy and felt good about my weight. It was my junior year of highschool, I was a size 12 and weighed about 157 pounds. However, I started gaining the weight back my senior year and have not stopped. I now weigh (yes girls this is incredibly embarrassing and difficult to do) 248 pounds. I am 5'8 1/2" and my target weight should be 140-160. To add insult to injury, a little while back I had my body fat percentage done, which was..............40% (NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!)
My measurements...I'll keep to myself for the time being! : ) Ladies I haven't completely lost my mind!!! Jessica would this be something to add to the real woman list?
Now, the reason I have put myself out there is to ask for support. I need help and accountability and prayer! Now this may seem insignificant compared to so many other needs and request out there, but I feel this is a matter of life and death for me. I know if I keep on the path I'm heading, statistically, I'm in line for diabetes, heart disease, cancer, and just generally bad health. I want to feel better about myself, better than I ever have and I know that I have got to get this weight off in order to get to that point.
With all that said, I want to give mad props to my amigos at the Lambright that I know will and have been supportive of me, and they are: Chad, Jamie, Kate (whatup!), Nicole, Meghan (what what), and my card slidey guys : ) What I ask of all of you is PRAYER, and if you think about it ENCOURAGEMENT.
Thanks so much, and just so you know, it's been 36 hours since I last had a sugary carbonated beverage. (Thank God for coke zero!)

Kinda like an Ice cream tester...who's lactose intolerant!

You know there are things, in and of themselves, that are bad or embarrassing, when they happen. However, when compounded by other things, such as a job title, they can seem so much more worse. For example an ice cream tester who is lactose intolerant, a pirate who gets severly seasick, a dog groomer, who is allergic to dogs, an Orkin man who screams like a little girl at the sight of a bug, or a deputy sheriff who, on her lunch break locks her keys in the car and then has to call the sheriff's department to come and unlock her vehicle as she waits outside in the cold to wait for a deputy because she refuses to walk back inside the subway so that everyone knows the deputy has locked her keys in the car which would only add to the humiliation she is already experiencing and would only get more of when she walks in the doors of the sheriff's department! Now it may seem like I'm speaking from experience, but that would be preposterous!! I could and would never do a thing like that, I'm just saying wouldn't that be bad if it did happen!

I know you're all wondering....

Ok, I know everyone wants to know where I am and what I'm doing. RIGHT!!! Well, if you look at my profile you can see I'm back in Ruston, moved into a small house and living by my lonesome, which has it's good points and bad. Whenever I get lonely I just start talking to one of my personalities, then it's all gravy ; ) No seriously, right now it's not so bad because I'm hardly ever there. I'm working at the Lincoln Parish Sheriff's Office m-f 8a to 5p, then I go to the Lambright Sports Center from like 6p- 9 or 10p and do massage. Yes, I am licensed and official. However, some of you may be wondering why I'm working at the sheriff's dept. full time and doing massage in the evenings. A couple of reasons: 1) massage is not a reliable career 2) no insurance or benefits (anywhere you work, you are considered a self-contractor) 3) if you work at a spa that advertises outrageous prices for massage, don't think that the therapist is getting anywhere close to that amount. Case in point: I worked at a spa in a casino in S'port the prices were $55 for 30 min., $90 for 60min., and $120 for 90min. The spa made 60% of everything I made...you do the math. Now, you may say that's still alot of money, but that is pre-taxed and there are no set hours...I could have 15-20 hours of work (might have happened once) or no hours of work (happened more than I care to count). Lastly 4) although massage seems very glamorous and wonderful, which it is if you are receiving it, emphasis on RECEIVING. It is not so glamorous giving, and I have a few examples of that too, and yes there were a few opportunities for me to make some "extra money"...if you know what I mean (I passed on those, FYI) .
So that's where I am (in a nutshell) and if any of you happened to be in Ruston look me up and try a massage or maybe we'll do lunch!!!

My first blogging experience...

Hey what's up everyone! This is my first experience with this blogging stuff, so bear with me. I recently discovered from my friend, Shonnie, that if I want to know anything about anyone that I have ever met in my entire life (or maybe just my friends from Tech) that I just need to blog. I, of course, thought Shonnie must be into this "new age" stuff like astral projection or ouija boards. However, she explained to me a little about the blog world and showed me all her links. I was very excited to see that you guys had not been abducted by aliens, as I figured must have happened to ya'll. Anyway, I'm very excited to read up on everyone and see what everyone's been doing. Now, I do want to send a shout out to Michael and Meg... took you two long enough to figure out ya'll were supposed to get married, I knew when I was what at Tech. I know you two are great for each other (Meg I'll be praying for you ; D, you know I love you Michael).
Ok, it's almost 5pm (quitting time) so I gotsta wrap this up!

In His Loving Arms!!!!!!
Winter